10/10/2023
Don’t like being the center of attention? View ice breakers as an unnecessary evil? Then come to Club Introvert, the hottest spot at SUNY Cortland for anyone who wants to embrace their quiet side.
Access to the not-so-exclusive club is free every Tuesday from 4 to 5 p.m. in Corey Union, Room 209. No sign up is required. The goal, according to Prevention Educator Marissa Whitaker, is simple: let introverted students connect without the pressure of forcing friendships.
It was Whitaker and Senior Counselor Jen Talarico of Counseling and Wellness Services — both self-professed introverts — that came up with and developed the idea this semester. The two first discussed it as a joke, and wondered how many introverts would be willing to join and talk with other people.
“We decided on a whim to give it a shot,” Whitaker said. “The worst-case scenario was we would see each other for an hour and then no students would come. But much to our surprise, we actually had seven students at our very first one.”
As facilitators, Whitaker and Talarico give an outline of possible topics to talk about before each meeting. In Whitaker’s experience, being prepared helps make a social setting more comfortable. Topics have ranged from Halloween movies to whether yellow Starbursts should stay in the pack with their better liked brethren. (Spoilers: In a divisive decision, no they do not.)
Guests at Club Introvert can expect a place where it's easy to relate and feel comfortable with each other. Whitaker knows firsthand that, for introverts, silence can be golden but that they still want to make connections. It’s a topic that she and Talarico talked about as part of their university podcast, “Silver Linings.” In its first episode they discussed introvert myths, and the belief that they’re always shy and reserved.
“That’s not the case at all,” Whitaker said. “If you find something that an introverted person wants to talk about, or you get them within their group of peers, you would never know that people are introverted in these club meetings. So, I think that’s a really big misperception is that introverted people can't socialize — they do.”
An introvert may not wish to be alone, but socializing can still be difficult or exhausting. Whitaker and Talarico designed Club Introvert as a place where even the most reserved socializers won’t hit their limit quickly.
“You can come whenever you want within that hour and you can leave whenever you want within the hour,” Whitaker said. “As an introvert, I also like to know what an exit strategy would be, so if you get there and you decide ‘I’m not feeling this, this isn’t my vibe,’ then you can go no questions asked.”
Early results show the program is working. The first gathering in September welcomed seven students. Since then, meetings have had as many as 20. Whitaker said she’s even been asked if another Club Introvert could be opened for faculty and staff.
It’s one of the rare times that an introvert like Whitaker appreciates a sudden flood of attention.
“The program was a success after the very first one. Hearing the students ask, ‘Where have you been this whole time?’ made the whole thing worth it to me. After the first one, a few students exchanged phone numbers. We’re not facilitating the exchange of numbers, but if that’s happening organically, that’s exactly what we wanted to do — find ways for people to connect in a nontraditional format.”
For more information on Club Introvert, or if you’d like to become a member yourself, email marissa.whitaker@cortland.edu.